Where would you go?

Where would you survive?

How are you fighting for what you are?

Show some care, if you have

Show some love on the way

If its the road you looking at,

Is it showing you the way?

Shine some light on the stone

Walk a step, keep walking,

Finally weary of the walk

You step to rest

Who are you going to talk to?

The phones don’t work,

The time is not going too fast.

So, close your eyes and

See the journey or what is left behind.

Or is it the future you see!!

Whichever path you tread,

Darkness is always behind.

thunderbolt

“e stato un colpo di fulmine” (it has been a stroke of lightening) goes an Italian saying for love at first sight, a thing of “thunderbolt” in Mario Puzo’s Godfather....

Read the book, saw the movie but nothing just prepared me for this, it was way back going more than 7 years back. I am telling you my story now.

It was back in the winter month of 2002, when i was just in the flag end of my teenage life, a sad existence i thought it was, well all teenagers thing that i guess!!! So was hesitant to get all perked up and look happy and get dressed for a wedding to attend, well not a fun thing to do anyways but went with it, imagine my boredom just looking at all the proceedings going on, somehow that mundane thing went on quite faster than i expected, one thing i must say, food was the highlight of the noon.

So there this girl was standing next to the bride, not noticing from all that racing and pacing in my mind, passed by as softly as i came.

Like this wasn’t enough there was a big reception the very evening!, who would want to go to the same marriage twice, yet in all that formal clothing( felt like a jackass) seemed to me as if it was too soon to be in a big boys club.

Seemed hostile situation at first, then began to like it, as soon as we walked in i saw this young lady, the same whom i didn’t notice earlier, and i was there.. stuck, unable to move, and like in Godfather i didn’t have any bodyguards or was i on exile.. regained composure in a while and walked on turning to look back at an angel who seemed to just lure me into that charm of never getting up again J .

Met some friends of my family, chatting with them head still buzzing with all kinda excitement,

I saw her again.. what can i say!! The sight was so vivid and beautiful, catching each turn, every blink of her eyes, the gleam and twinkle in her eyes, all i was waiting for was a smile to make it complete. hmmmm.... didn’t have to wait for long, there it was a smile to make her perfect.

But before it settled in, there i was yanked by my Dad to meet some friends, and there lost that only reason to stay at the reception, after which all my efforts to find her again in the crowd was lost, it was just like a mirage an angelic one.

Next day was a daze, got up into a mist of feeling i had not known... somehow deep inside i just knew i was in love(or whatever u want to call it) with a girl whose name i didn’t know, whose whereabouts i had no clue, only thing lingered was the fresh scent of rose and that face etched still so fresh..

inspiration

ever wonder why william wordsworth found the nature so beautiful to write about!! to see it that way when everybody else is busy in their own busy life!!! i found one such inspiration, not for a poetic one, but a sense of peace, a full moonlit beach, just nothing t disturb your serenity except the sound of the waves crashing which in a while becomes musical, a beethoven symphony rewritten in natures own way, well u can make that time anything.. a romantic haven, a sad mans pain, a tranquil world, or an inspiration........

fresh lease...

wonder sometimes when u walk on the road on a hot sunny day, a small breeze blowing down gives you that sense of relief!!! that breather to forget every momentary irritation to just enjoy that time.....
have you ever thought of being a kid again, to feel no responsibility, to enjoy life's small happiness and yet be completely satisfied with it.!!!!
want to know what it is like through the eyes of a child, how they see it... how they come to terms with this eternal chaos!!!

tunnel...

its been 5.5yrs i am here at the end of this line, i have seen myself grow from a pretty college boy to a more mature and clean man, i find it all amusing, like to say its a tunnel back then we just entered it not knowing what to expect and just tread in the path looking fwd to make it to the light at the other end...
now almost at that end of the tunnel i turn back to see how far have i come, i can only see a shimmer of the light on the other side, knowing that you can take this path only once and in only one dirction, i let out a smile and walk again....

laying the ghosts to rest

I m sure this sentiment i m going to share has happened to many of us, it started out in my college days back in the time when naivity was rules, well love is not the first one in that list. But eventually with all ideas we do fall, fall we do from the utmost height.
Its amazing what it does to you when it happens, those were the best days of my college life, thought me to live, to give and to receive, but somewhere down that lane it falls, it falls from the same height but to a fathom deeper, its pained and broken, i may blame myself for it or my luck, but as i look back its not anything but the immaturity to understand the subtle things in a relationship which does us in.
What was lost was not love but a part of life in itself, that feeling of home, happiness was just gone, you become another person again, which for a long time will haunt the way we have never wanted, its pretty silly to write this thing on a blog, but wanted to finally rest my case, all that anger, sadness, pain should finally end with just letting it flow away like the wind blowing to take away the heat.
I am still pretty much wondering if what i did was right because I felt so much at home like i never felt Before, but sometimes in solitude just cant stop feeling that emptiness, its a sad thing to know someone where at a point you make so much changes, compromises and sacrifices just to enjoy the fact that you love each other, and which in one streak of mindless madness turns out to be a disaster , ii hope by this writing i can wash the monkeys on my back...
Still life is so long and at the same time short, don’t want to brood and lie static at one time.